back to buenos

my time in cali has come to an end and today i find myself in one of my favorite cites: buenos aires. it wasn’t easy getting here, i almost didn’t make my bogota flight due to weather and the flight to buenos aires was completely full. i was given a seat in the last moment and my blood pressure finally took a break. this will be my 4th time in buenos aires. there are so many reasons why i love this city. i mostly associate it with the memories ive shared with friends in the past…(mostly spent over steak, wine and empanadas) but now its time to make new ones with some new friends. my friend aaron from LA is out here, we landed around the same time and spent most of the day cruising in scooters avoiding potholes and manic taxi drivers. we checked out ricoleta cemetery, roamed around the mini mansions/mosuleam and finally found evita’s grave. we cooled off with a tasty beer from nearby brewery patagonia hailing from the southern city of bariloche. we ditched the scooters and hopped on an uber back to our hostel and quickly made friends with an aussie - also named aaron - a brit, american, serbian, and a dutch. im not exactly sure who started it but we began to talk about our favorite films fro the next 2 hours and it was beautiful to see really, how all of us from different countries can love film so much along with hearing how different our opinions were about the film we loved. many beers and a very crappy shawarma later both aaron’s and i found ourselves at a dash berlin trance concert. had never been to a trance concert before but very glad i went. the place was packed and when the headliner came on everyone erupted with cheers and hands in the air. the next 4 hours the man kept spinning and twisting dials, morning light greeted us directly behind us as the night sky slowly lifted its veil. didn’t get back to the hostel until 9am, slept till 1pm. today is saturday and i am in buenos aires  

cali to cali

where do i start. lets start with these random heat/walking/mystery rashes ive been getting; how about i don’t. i’m currently in cali, not california. i came to cali, colombia on a whim and ive been whimming ever since. i really can’t tell you why im here, i vaguely remember a friend i met in a medellin hostel mentioning “cali is ok” and well, to be honest yeah, its ok. 

the city is known for its salsa but apparently salsa isn’t even native here. salsa actually hails from the big apple, new york city USA. i learned that tidbit from yesterday’s walking tour, which was…ok. fernando, our walking tour guide was a chill dude, i and some germans and an american girl named jess from chicago exchanged info with him and a few hours later we took advantage of a 2x1 valentines special cali deportivo soccer match. it was a lot of fun but instantly as i walked into the stadium i sadly remembered that they don’t sell beer at soccer events in colombia; tragic really, by the second half i caved and ordered an “aguila cero” and with that went my first non-alcoholic beer cherry. the match ended, the home team won, i said goodbye to the germans and came back to my hostel a different man.

i began writing this a few hours ago in a BBC brewery when my new friend jenn showed up. the writing stopped, a few more beers were consumed. a nap was taken and then i met jenn again in a salsa club which was fun and wacky. fun because of the locals who seriously are on a different level of salsa and wacky because of the insane amount of white tourists that flood the dance floor after 11pm. so much so that you can’t even see the locals. 

cali, ive only been inside of you for less than 2 days and yet i feel like ive traversed more broken slabs of concrete and dog shit than the ordinary tourist does in a month. thanks 

the year is 2020, off with IG’s head

the year is 2020 and with that another valiant effort to produce something with meaning. 2/3 of january is already in the past and yet my prose has nothing to show. the truth is that my writing hasn’t existed for for a while but my instagram feed however does have a few cool posts and there lies the problem. 

31, for what its worth

31
it was a hell of a ride
but i would also like to say sorry.
for a minute it seemed like i would never sleep on my own bed and i'll admit that it began to wear.
some beds were comfortable but others were slabs of cold porcelain. 
im not complaining.
i chose the life and i've given up alot to be missing the simple vanity of a comfy bed;
although its nice. 

the last breath i remember taking was back in february
when i hopped on a flight to kona, 
then galapagos, 
san blas islands came next and so on. 
i met some amazing people along the way, some that i'll probably catch up with later in life.

thats kind of how it works. i meet amazing people in crazy circumstances, bond over drink and travel and we say our "catch you on the next one"
at that the moment i find myself inside drinking tea in my beautiful los angeles and it feels strange.
i haven't been home for my birthday in years. 
the feeling is strange but feel good knowing that im going to see my family tonight. 
31
for what its worth, you made me into a stronger man. ive grown the courage and ability to say no to the wrong jobs, bad relationships and youve affirmed that i can do whatever i put my mind to. 
im going to miss you, for some reason 32 definitely feels so much serious. 
i guess we will have to see 

inside the heart of the angkors

the AM hours were still shrouded in darkness.
im not sure who's alarm went off first but the journey into the mystic angkors of siem reap was finally here and although the sun remained chained,
we knew that in just a few hours its fiery wake would have no mercy.

i can still remember the unseen heat of dawn invading my every pore, hiding in every obscure corner.
our tour guide spoke softly as our van speared through the morning's muggy dew. bun made us aware of the beauty and many hazards of these ancient angkors

but my senses slowly began to drift into the nothing that stares from the other side of the glass.
time drags its fingers across the unseen jungle reminding me of its presence.

darkness finally loosens its grip and faint shadows reveal an exhausted jungle. the pulse of these ancient cities are projected through the cicada,
which at this very moment warn the jungle of intruders.
the van finally stops and i have a strong feeling that i dont belong here.

nevertheless we press on and make our approach through the less popular eastern gate.
massive trees along with broad canopies stand side by side making it difficult for dawn's light to pierce through.

sunrise is moments away and already i can feel the heat rising like the impending blast of hiroshima.


i arrive at the point where east meets the western gate crowd.
i marvel and hang on the outer edges of angkor watt; the moat perfectly catching the reflection of its towers along with the delicate pink hue from above. this moment is holy
and will forever remain so
the thick jungle in the backdrop hides the horizon but i know the chains have fallen.
i am inside the heart of the angkors. 

Cambodia, it's about time

I don't know where I left off. It's been a while since I've worked up the courage to write again. For no apparent reason really, I guess I hate the feeling of writing again and then stopping halfway through like I normally do. I'll try and not do that again. 

Cambodia is on the horizon; quite literally, my flight is on initial descent and I can see it from my window seat. Michelle and I are less than an hour from landing and both of us have no clue what to expect. I've never been to Cambodia and the forecast calls for thunderstorms, high humidity and 90 degree weather, which means that Michelle is going to have a blast. I personally don't know what expect but I'm excited to again be in a situation that calls for growth and understanding.

just passing through guayaquil

*** 2/26/17

it's 8:30pm and i'm currently in the city of guayaquil inside a cuban piano bar on the outer rim of las peñas district. i just finished a 2-hour trek surveying the countless steps and dim lit alleyways of las peñas, which let me just say are countless. it's easy dismiss these alleyways as only just such; these are the front door porches of the people who live in these favela like mounds of cinderblock and rebar, which at that moment i was intruding. kids and young lovers conducted their business as i interjected my dark and sweaty mass of flesh through their world, but thankfully my parents taught me my native tongue and even though the years have chipped away at it, it still manages to get the job done.

i'm glad i made it to the top of las peñas because this club negra would've tasted a little less satisfying. why am i in guayaquil? funny story, i'm already supposed to be in galapagos but being the smart that i am, i booked myself on a flight with a 20 minute connection. did i mention that i was a smart man? deep down i knew that i probably wasn't going to going make it but thought why not give it a shot. that's been kind of my mantra most of my life and it doesn't seem like i'll be letting it go anytime soon. 

well, it seems like the mediocre piano player is getting warmed up now and with that i hold up my glass. 

2017 on a rainy friday

this morning began with a downpour of what do you call it again? oh yeah, rain. lots of it;

at least for southern california standards, which isnt much really.
and due to this wet element, i knew i wouldnt be able to drive anywhere remotely far from home so i finished watching season one of westworld and wow what a show.
i dragged myself out of bed and grabbed some lunch. it wasnt the healthiest choice and felt like a total heff so i decided to walk it off. the sky was still falling and so i asked myself where?
i didnt have to look further than the shopping center i was currently in to find the answer: costco
for the next 2 hours i weaved through every single isle of that business costco looking at paper plates, industrial size sinks, pallets full of candy/water/jerky/...etc.
i stepped inside the freezer and played it cool, literally. i didnt grab a jacket from the entrance and instantly regretted it. i walked around, took a keen liking at the ox tails pretending i was going to make a big purchase when all i was interested at were the hummus & greek yogurt packs. i began to do the math and thought about how much i spend during the week for food and i was astounded at how much more i can get if only i pre-planned and came to costco at the beginning of the week. thats when it hit me that im getting old. here i am walking around costco thinking of the steps i was getting on my pedometer, the money i could be saving on food, all the meals my non-existent wife & i could be making for the little bastards running around house but then younger early 20-year old inside of me stepped in and snapped me out of that weird loop. he then dragged me to this coffee bean where i ordered myself a medium dark roast accompanied with 2 bailey shooters. needless to say,  i feel good another year, another january and another new beginning. i dont know where 2017 will lead me but i sure hope that its far removed from 2016. 

a strange summer

it came like the big one

like the night thief you never expect
this summer came packaged in many ways
which i can’t quite put it into words

but something deep was happening.

i don’t know how but summer changed me
i flew across the atlantic to a place id long been 

avenues, alleys and churches recognized me
and after a decade of weathering i saw a familiar face
a younger, a cleaner version of myself
but i couldnt fill the gap, what would i say

that this strange land will forever change you
so i watched and decided to let him figure it out.
this clarity is haunting, i cant stop thinking about it

it's eating me from within that your face will soon be hollow

for all these words feel numb
they now are part of this alien world with no meaning
but i haven't really followed through and im sorry.

im walking in circles in the foolish comfort
that your thin lips would remain the same
but i know that is no longer true
and as much as id like to ping it
im finally going to let this pillar of salt fade   

because i can't connect with what i feel

knowing full well that there is no poetry that exists
in explaining what it is to know you.

spirit of the season

i live in a city where i hardly sense the changing of the seasons. for the most part things are relatively warm to scorching hot with a mild sprinkle of relative cold. things hardly change and ive always been a fan. but while our weather might not change as much, life does.
there is no forecast model, doppler or radar that can detect the next catastrophe.
life always finds a way to remind us that change isn't something simply confined by the falling of the leaves; that when you least expect it life will burst in and rudely remind you to buckle up.

last night, as my family and i finished eating and celebrating my little sister's 13th bday, we got news that my grandma's husband, (practically my grandfather) tony was shot 3 times in front of his house. he made it to the front porch where my grandma brought him in and called the paramedics. over the last 3 years my grandma has been in & out of the hospital and she's had a few operations for a weak heart. a few hours after the shots rang my grandma had a minor heart attack but luckily she was already at the hospital. nonetheless things did not look good.

a few days ago we were all eating thanksgiving dinner at the house. tony, eating like it was his last meal. grandma making 3 different batches of tamales. my sisters and brother in law joking with each other and telling stories with my parents. now i'm here seeing it all play in my head and i cant help but think that all of this will also pass. in the midst of this calamity i need to remind myself that God is in control and that He is good. He also speaks through these circumstances and so here goes & comes another season of change. 

summer spills and fall

i woke up from a nap that i really didnt need. i tried justifying it by the 11-hour flight i took this morning. the korean air flight from seoul to la went by quick but my friend michelle would say otherwise. im not sure how long i have to the next job/trip but for now im just glad to be home.

its been a strange summer and it doesnt feel like its over. i didnt have much sound work early on and i really cant register anything of significance happening at the airport. but then the work began to flow and a few trips began to take shape and form, which leads me to the middle of fall.

the summer whirlwind has softened and now i type. i didnt write much this summer. part of me would like to blame it on work but that wasnt it. i was and still am trying to work out some of the current and past friendships/relationships. the passion and inspiration has been lacking but not for long 

and somehow i ended up in haiti

mike and i landed in port-au-prince, haiti yesterday morning and spent the whole day speaking with UNDP leadership about the best way to document their progress with the haitians. we got some good contacts, took care of some logistics and now it's day 2. in a few moments we're going to start our 10-hour drive to Jeremie and it seems like we're in for a rough journey. but it ain't as bad when you have a morning view like this.

- merci 

summer-rut of 16'

the dreaded coffee shop is where i find myself again trying to accomplish adult things like organizing and prepping for the upcoming week but in between my serious attempts i easily get distracted at my disorganized itunes/google play music library. i migrated my pimsleur portuguese lessons to google play 2 years ago but most of the metadata came out whack and so for the past hour instead of getting my website going, my portuguese language is finally sorted out and maybe one day it might finally come to fruition. this whole summer has been somewhat of wash with a mix of old and new opportunities, aspirations, emotions, disappointments, much of the same in different wrapping. i haven’t written much and there lies the root so here goes. i also received my brand spankin’ new passport last week. 

im actually feeling much better. ok, on to adult things

Fireflies and Chicago

The last time I saw a firefly I was sitting outside the patio of a hostel in Tirana, Albania. I was halfway through the episode where *** game of thrones season 6 spoiler alert*** hodor dies and boom from the corner of my eye there they were. 

It is 9pm and I'm currently in the windy city of Chicago, Illinois. It is hot, humid and everywhere I go I seem to be surrounded by tatted up hipsters and joggers; pretty much LA but without as many d-bags (debatable). 

I landed about 3 hours ago and during this time span I hopped on the CTA to Logan's square and successfully found the keys to my friend's apartment, somehow managed to find the worst chinese fast food in Chicago, walked about 2 miles around LS admiring the fireflies while trying to calm the upset stomach from said shitty chinese food, walked into coffee shop/bar and ordered two brothers' cane and ebel red rye ale, and proceeded to relieve myself of the evil that the shitty chinese food did to my stomach. 

My friends from LA are flying in tomorrow but I decided to get here a day before for no particular reason other than I had the day off, I didn't want to be home, and gave me an extra day to catch up with my friend Deisy who I don't follow on instragram. 

I'm here till Sunday and the plan calls for day drinks, bratts, bbq, cubs baseball, music and a viewing of the movie titanic starring leonardo di caprio at the park.  

31 in bozeman

I can't remember the last time I spent a birthday in LA - I think I was in my mid-twenties - but the older I get the less important they seem to become. The importance of these yearly milestones have shifted to the people I've met in-between, which brings me to the cast & crew of the short film I worked on Willow Creek Road.

Last month I recorded sound in the beautiful state of Montana. The producer and AD, Jon and Josh picked me up from the airport and brought me to Lauri's. Lauri had kindly opened her beautiful house to the whole crew where I was lucky enough to have my own room. Sort of 

I really didn't mind my porcelain roommates partly because I was exhausted by the time I stepped into that room. Looking back now it seems crazy how we all managed fit in that house. Every member of our crew played a vital part in making the production a success. It didn't hurt that a lot of them were big game of thrones fans, which made for a great viewing of the season 6 finale. 

All of the good vibes made for a sad goodbye. 

On the last day everyone had early AM flights so by the time I woke up the house was empty with the exception of our 1st AC, Andy who I had worked with on a previous gig in LA. I can still remember the eerie calm of that morning as we sat in the living room and waited for Lauri to take us to the airport.

I'm 31 now. Nothing really has changed and I'm not sure if that's good or bad. Maybe it's a little bit of both? I don't know. I can't believe I still haven't finished this post. Adios 

Tripping through the Balkans (pt.4)

It doesn't feel like 2 1/2 weeks, it feels much longer than that; like I lived a quasi life out here. I got my first taste of the Balkans a few years ago via Belgrade, Serbia but till now I thought that it was a Serbian thing. Well, it turns out that it isn't. I always knew that this place was special but I didn't know to what extent. 

I dragged my feet but eventually I made it out of Ohrid with an unexpected stop in the capitol of Macedonia: Skopje. I met the owner of the hostel Nena, a 6'2" broad-shoulder bearded beast of a man and aspiring actor. He gave us a tour of the city and the ridiculous amount of statues that surround the center and then he took us to a local restaurant. We broke bread and then Nena shared his dreams of coming to LA and making it big as an actor, his two daughters, and the other obscure jobs he has. It was late into the night when we began to walk back to the hostel. A tiny car pulled up behind us, I naturally tensed up but it was Nena's other job. He said his goodbye and quickly sped off into the night.

The next morning Andrew hopped on a bus to Thessaloniki and Danny and I took another to Sofia. That was 3 days ago. My time here Bulgaria has been chill but I feel like my mind body and soul know that my time here has come to an end. A few hours ago I had to say goodbye to Danny, a complete stranger I knew nothing about a week ago but now I feel like I gained a Dutch/Chinese brother, along with another French/Serbian and English brother. Can't forget about my Turkish and German/Italian sister that I left bedhind in Ohrid or my other Montenegro brothers Urosh and Danilo, and the crazy Swiss-French Sebastian who I met up with here in Sofia. 

Sofia, you seem like an amazing city but you've caught me at a rocky time. I appreciate your city and its beautiful lasagna layers of culture, architecture and people but I'm feeling a little blue at the moment. But it's Friday night and I'm planning to shake those blues away because something tells me that this isn't goodbye.

Tripping through the Balkans (pt.3)

For the moment it seems as if time has softened its grip; every memory from this place is all jumbled together like one long day. Its been 5 days since I crossed the Albanian-Macedonia border. I was supposed to leave yesterday but here I am contemplating another. 

To say that Ohrid is a special place would be a huge understament. 

I don't want to leave. This whole place feels like one big postcard and the people I've met here have placed a huge accent on the back of that card. 

We didn't stay long at Sunny Lake Hostel, there was nothing wrong but when we heard about Robinson's Sunset House I knew that we had to stay there. When we got to Robinson's all we saw was a rocky hill that led into the forest. I kept scanning the lot and there it was, carved into the mountain 100 feet up. The hike was tough especially with all my gear but when we finally made it to the top it was all worth it. 

Again, all of that seems like such a lifetime ago. Misha and his father have created something beautiful up here and I'm not just talking about the accommodations. From the canoes down by the lake, or the homemade rakja that never seemed to end each night, Robinson's Sunset House will forever be etched into my memory.  

I'm currently sitting on the balcony right in front of my room and still I can't believe this view. There is about 20 more minutes of sunlight. There's a gentle breeze blowing from the west, the sound of waves crashing down below, and a few sighs coming from deep within my soul. Tomorrow the group will disperse, I will go to Bulgaria, some to Greece, others Albania, and a few will stay here. 

Macedonia: 

I don't have the right words to describe you. They seem lost maybe somewhere along the trails below your mountains or possibly floating down your tiny ocean. Till then I will continue to search and maybe next time I'm here I'll be able to find them. 

h'vala

Tripping through the Balkans (pt.2)

The distance between Podgorica and Tirana is 130 kilometers, which is roughly 81 miles. Back in LA I can travel this in little over an hour; it's a different story in the Balkans. It took almost 6 hours on bus and all I kept thinking about was this.

I arrived in Tirana 4 days ago and in the course of writing this entry yesterday morning, two exhausted Aussies walked into the hostel and naturally we began to chat. 2 hours went by, we spoke of our travels and I found out why they were so exhausted. It turns out that they had just taken a 24-hour bus ride from Athens to Tirana and as our warm homecooked breakfast - omelets, fresh cheese, peach marmalade and toast - was brought to us, the look on their faces was priceless.

I began to tell them about Tirana and how originally I was going to spend only a night but then I told them how thankful that I didn't. I told them that the city is small, very walkable, nothing really that'll blow your mind; not so quite like 
Podgorica but in the same neighborhood. Having said that, again it all comes down to the people. It doesn't seem like it at first because frankly they're also looking at you in the same manner but the Albanians and Albania is still getting warmed up to tourism, which is why its such a great & exciting time to be here. People are very inviting if you give them a chance and that's what I did and what I'll continue to do.

As I begin to wrap this entry I sit on the top balcony of Sunny Lake Hostel, sipping some warm joe, seeing another beautiful sunrise over the mountains.

The location: Ohrid, Macedonia. The journey to this place involved another bus ride (not so long this time) to podgarec, then hopped on a cab to the Albania-Macedonian border where we literally walked across, and then finally waited for a city bus that took us through the mountains and finally here in the early evening.
 From the little that I've walked I can only use one word to describe this place, mystical: the lake, the mist, the thick green algae on the shore, the strewn and abandoned boats laying side by side, the tall mountains in the back, yeah mystical sounds about right and today I'll get to see the full extent of it. 

I had no idea that this trip was going to bring me through the Balkans but that's the beauty of traveling with a blank boarding pass. God is good and I'm very fortunate to be having these moments, 

God bless!

Tripping through the Balkans (pt.1)

Sleep has been something of an elusive chase as it usually is during these kind of trips. The 13-hour flight from Los Angeles to Istanbul went smooth but things got crazy in Turkey as I only had less than 40 minutes to connect to my gate to Montenegro. If it wasn't for the kind kelp of the Turkish Air transfer desk lady who gave me my seat but also gave me that dreaded look, the one which I've come to know of very well I probably would've slept in the airport that night. She looked at her wrist watch, made a call, heavy Turkish was exchanged and then she said "go, fast!" She took me to the front of the security checkpoint, wished me luck and waived goodbye.

 All that mess seems like such a lifetime ago. 

It's currently morning and I'm sitting inside a living room in Tirana, Albania after spending the last 4 days in Podgorica, Montenegro. When I tell other travelers how long I stayed in PG they give me a strange look "4 days, really?!...in Podgorica?" Yep, 4 days. 

The truth is that nobody should ever stay longer than 1-2 day in Podgorica. There's really nothing to note, nothing that'll have you blowing up your instagram/snapchat other than a few raggedy old dogs, a futuristic looking bridge, and the delicious burgers from Rostilj Perper.
I say this and yet it only took a few human connections to make it a great place to break bread with the locals and find that it takes but a few Beatles and Fleet Foxes jams to relate and enjoy laughs together. 

This is when Urosh and his younger brother Danilo came into my life. 

I cant honestly tell you how i came to meet Urosh. I had already befriended Sebastian, a Crazy Swiss-French who was staying at my hostel. It just so happened to be the eve of Montenegro's 10-zear independence, Sebastian and I were both coming out of Berlin and we somehow caught wind that the next place to be at was District. We never found it but being the loud Swiss-French that he is, Sebastian began to make friends along the way. the next thing I remember is this gentle Sasquatch of a man walking alongside giving us a tour of the city at 3am. We walked so much but it didn't matter, we kept cracking jokes till the sun rose and promised to hang later that night. Hours later I woke explosions and for a second I wasn't quite sure where I was. It slowly came to me as I saw the fireworks overhead 

Sebastian and David came downstairs shortly after, then we headed back to Berlin, where Urosh's younger brother Danilo was DJ.It was a repeat of the night before this time with a bigger crew. we were invited to a friend's apartment in the outskirts of town.

Things got a little dodgy as some of the guys in the group brought out their favorite recreational drug of choice; at one point of the night we were also waiting for a drop? I don't know, it all got kind of cloudy but we ended the night as we hung from the 5th story of an incomplete balcony as the sun rose behind us and the moon set behind the mountains and hills in front. 

Danilo began to strum the guitar and played a few ballots, then we began to walk back to our hostel. Urosh and Danilo took us to eat breakfast and then we said our goodbyes.

Sadly it was to be the first of a string of many goodbyes I've already made on this trip but that's the nature of traveling. You meet people, you get thrown into these crazy, fish out of water situations and you quickly build bonds. Urosh and Danilo, you've made a Mexican brother and you will always have a home in Los Angeles. 

Now to get a home in Los Angeles...

in the span

the phrase “if i could only go back” has been thrown many times.

my question: well, how long? ten years? five years? 

how about a month, just one gregorian month. 

in the span of this month the world i’ve come to know during these past 8 years has been rocked 

and although my faith remains unmoved, alot of silt has been dredged from beneath me;

unproductive topsoil blown away. maybe its a good thing.

if someone took me back to april 1st, 2016 and sat me across a cloaked stranger revealing the things i now know id shout bullshit; BULLSHIT! 

now if that person revealed himself to be my future self then that’d be insane. 

there’d be so many questions but i (future self) really wouldn’t be able to say much;

the only advantage id have would be a month’s worth of insight. 

then things would get awkward, primarily because wow time travel and you know…

but soon afterwards my awe would turn into shock as the life i’d come to love and know would soon be gone.

it was 4am when the first shots rang. the words all sounded hollow as i read the email in the darkness

a few weeks ago alaska airlines bought virgin america; none of us saw this coming but there it was all over the news and social media.

this merger between alaska and virgin wasn’t just business, it was people’s lives. 

as much as our CEO david cush tried to justify it, it was just too good of a deal to pass up and just like that we were sold like a cheap trick.

its been a strange and bizarre past few weeks. so many changes that are coming our way 

and it really hasn’t sunk in yet. the words don’t come out easy but it feels like i’ve been given up, abandoned, orphaned. 

i was really hoping that virgin would be the first and only airline that id work for but it doesn’t seem like that is going to happen. but change, thats life.